Pacific Rim 24 Hour- Race Report

Before the 9 a.m. start I was positive. I believed that my training would pay off, my fueling plan, walk strategy and positive outlook would carry me through for 24 hours, 100+ miles and to the land of redemption that I have been seeking for years.

I would love to be reporting back to all of you right now that my race was a success, but once again it was not. It was not the race I was hoping for and it was not the race I had trained for.

Perhaps I was not as prepared as I thought. Perhaps I should have run more miles beforehand and stretched a few of my long runs out to 50+ miles. Perhaps I did not take enough salt, or my water to salt ratio was off. Perhaps the Ensure made my stomach queasy, or maybe it was the slice of pizza. Perhaps I just gave up!

Typically after a race "failure" I seek answers. I beat myself up and wonder what I did wrong. I don't think that a race that is a "failure" makes me a failure, so please don't misunderstand the criticism of myself.

The first few hours of the race Steve and I ran steady and smart. We stuck to my plan of run 2 miles and walk 2 minutes. I took 2-GU's per hour and about a 1/2 bottle of Ensure Plus as well as a salt cap every hour. The only thing that threw us off schedule was a multitude of bathroom breaks that should have been figured in to my calculations. We adjusted and came in with 23 miles in the first 4 hours. The plan called for 24.

Hours 4-6 we continued with our 2 mile run, 2 minute walk strategy and stayed consistent on the fueling as well. After 6 hours we were at 34 miles and feeling good. Everything was going as planned.

I had a down point during hour 7, but came out of it after a few miles with a little bit more walking. We adjusted our walking strategy and began walking for a shorter period every mile rather than every 2 miles. Things were going good and after 8 hours we had 42 miles and in relation to other runners were mid pack. We set our sights on getting in 50 miles by the 10 hour mark.

We had 3 walking points each lap at this point. There are 3 "hills" on the course that are really only hills during a 24 hour race. We walked for a short period at each hill and ran the rest of the way. At 10 hours we hit our mark of 50 miles and I was feeling positive that we would reach 100, but it was still a long ways to go. Perhaps this is where I made the biggest mistake of focusing on the end goal rather than a couple hours at a time.

After 50 miles I don't remember any positive points. I had another very low point where my stomach was feeling queasy and my shins were really hurting. I started to walk more and then would come out of the funk, but after another hour or so it seemed as if I was right back in the funk.

Mentally, I was going downhill. I really started to focus on reaching 100 miles and calculating how many miles I would have to do per hour in order to make it. I figured it was about 3.5 miles per hour. It all sounded so simple, but believe me it is not that easy.

We hit 100k and were with Michelle, Jenny and Abi at this point. This is where I went into the endless trench where I walked with my head down, everything was tense, my shins were killing me and my attitude was diminishing quickly. I tried to keep track of the laps, but when I switched to a new page on the lap counting sheet I moved to another slot and I started looking at someone else's miles who happened to be about 3 miles ahead of me. When I thought I was on mile 67 I really was only on mile 64. When I came around to what I thought was mile 69 only to discover it was only mile 66 I got down and never came out.

I had been primarily walking for over an hour at this point and when I attempted to run it was slow and painful. I left for mile 67 and my walk was a slow shuffle at best and the demons were taking over. I started to feel sorry for myself and the pain intensified in my shins. I just wanted to lay down for a bit and elevate my legs. I walked into the trailer and despite prods and attempts I didn't come out until about 7 a.m.

During the night it felt good to lay and rest. However, I knew that the pain felt after the race was going to be much greater than the pain in my legs at that moment. The pain of not reaching my goal would eat at me for weeks and months to come and yet it was not enough to get me out of that trailer.

When I came out in the morning to check out how the race was developing I saw Joe Lee walking after 115 miles. He asked if I wanted to walk a few laps and I decided to do so. In my Birkenstocks, I completed 3 more miles to finish off with 70 miles.

The end was bittersweet. The success of others was inspiring to see and yet I wished I was one of them. I wished that I was tough enough to have gutted it out during the night. I used to be that person and now I wonder where he went. Where did the determination go? Where did the power of positive thinking go? Where did my grit and guts go?

For now, those are the questions I seek to answer.